Shadow chaser

1.

The day is drawing nearer....time to pack but I still have a couple of stuff to nail down before leaving.
Anyway, I was a bit down this morning when the Germany deal failed. The writer did not have the authority to purchase so she decided to use some other shots from somewhere. I realized that I did the right thing - none of my shots are for free! My skills, effort & passion comes with it so no way I am giving any of it easily for free. Though it means I am back to square one, the time will come when it will come sooner or later insyaAllah!
To cater for "the loss" I decided to send two shots to the stock agency I am attached to...Alhamdulillah...not bad at all, one of the two shots was accepted so, I am good. More stock shots for the agency after this!

2.
I don't know exactly why I like to compose shadows..but part of it was due to some influence by Trent Parke's works. I even created a dedicated experimental & discussion thread in one local photography forum about composing shadows. After more than a year, the thread is still pretty much active and shots are still being sent in for discussions. Well anyway, the shot above was accepted by the agency (proper format, not web version like this one lah). I did it while waiting for Mama to pick me up from work....

3.
The present state of my spot in the zoo!

Wehehehe!! The boxes are waiting to be filled. The mess will be cleared soon for the next occupant...who, I don't know and I don't really want to know! I don't actually car much about the workstaion. Where ever I am stationed this one section will remain the same. This is where I put the photos and stuff to remind me of my kids & family. Some of the items have been with me ever since I started working more than a decade ago....and still in good condition...like the white mug in this shot....been there with me since 1996!

4.
Recently I added another member to my fountain pen collection (as if aku ada byk sgt fountain pen!! Wekekeek!). I bought the same Lamy!! The purpose is to have one with green ink and one in black ink.
....but I have not written anything for a very long time in that monologue.....will have to start again soon since I have decided not to bring the Mac to office anymore so that I can spend time to write & shoot, not editing!

5.
Can't wait for the week to end...have planned something for the kids!

Olympia DL2000

1.
There is only so much of things on a list that I can do in a day. Sometimes I can do more, sometimes I can do less. Sometimes I just don't bother to do the list and decided to do anything else , totally unrelated to the list. That is a sign that I am tired or pi**ed with something or someone or many things....or many "ones"....but I still try to do the minimum so that nobody will be in trouble....to don't look too bad to the eyes of any farking people they are trying to impress. Recently, I had to do deliver another "small" miracle for the Zoo....and I did. Then, as I though I am incompetent imbecile, I was shoved and kept in the dark..and today the whole shipload is at a place discussing things for the benefit of the organization in the next FY. Everybody else is there because we need to cut the number of support staff...and I am one who volunteered to not to be there. Support staff? Eheheh! With this brain that I have, I am not going to rate myself just as a support staff ! I have had enough of everything with this Zoo. Last Friday I was in the lift with the Top Most Leader The Zoo - The VeePee. I don't even bother to say salam or hello to him. I consciously made that effort not to. He's not entitled for any kind of respect from me. The rest of the Zoo have given enough of that already I guess..for whatever reason. Truth be told, this same idiot was the one "officiating" an orientation for a bunch of new staff, lead by a Penghulu. That Penghulu observed this same person and concluded he's filled of bulls**t and knows nothing about the other business lines except for the one he's been doing all his life...and not an impressive contribution at all so to say, because the mess had to be cleared up by the next leader who took the place. Ironically the Penghulu was also called in to be in of of the transformation effort...and couple of years after that took pride to be in the seat of a unit he himself helped created.
To cut short, the Penghulu is moi. No applause please...I was just doing my part to turn the organization to the better.
The journey to the center of the organization has come to end end and I can conclude my hypothesis when I first started in working - I was spot on. The center is filled with....(you have read my entries...fill in the blanks)....who has no respect to the lines and too afraid to face them.
Finally I can move on - and they made it look as if I am not fit to be here - so insecure, these bastards - the fact is there are more than 3 positions waiting for me without requiring me to be interviewed. No, I am not damn good - only the Zoo creatures always like to think they are - I just do my part of the deal as expected and hope to get a proper reward as a return from the unit I am in.
So far, it never happen. The worse is when I am not only denied my rewards but being demoted without proper justification.
So when I got the letter from HR Zoo, who mentioned that I need to improve yadayadayada...I just put it aside and wish someday some of the idiots in the HR fraternity will be audited and be properly punished - they don't have a clue what is happening in the organization...if they even do, they just prefer to shove it up their own arsses and pretend they have made things good for everybody. Amazing.

...okay, enough rambling. The day is 16th August....but I am shutting down all my contribution to the Zoo from today - the final "miracle" has been delivered and I was treated like an idiot for helping out so I don't think I owe anybody in this Zoo anything more than just a polite "talk to the hand" message from today!

2.
There! My new toy! A very unique camera sold to me by my good-old buddy Ian Ahmad: great talent in photojournalism and documentary photography - please visit his site, the link at the sidebar of this blog. He has quite a collection of camera - which he bought at very low prices...the thing about Ian is he is not actually a collector, he uses the cameras to test his skills and try to produce the best!

Olympia DL200

Well...I have just sent the first roll of film to be processed. Shots taken from last Friday up to this morning. Even did a night photography session with Ian & Jidin, after we had a really good discussion with Shuk & Zaid of Belantara on the weekend....I went to bed at 4am that morning.

3.
This week I want to be a bit more serious than the previous 2-3 weeks in framing my daily shots...maybe need to do a proper plan to deliver a short documentary of a subject by end of this week.....

So....for a start....I have to listen to more RATM music!!

36y + 12d and counting days....

1.

It's been almost 12 days. Been trying my best to cope with stuff in the Zoo....difficult to find time to write and when I am back at home, cannot keep awake that long anymore...fatigue. Maybe because I am forcing myself too much to do stuff for the Zoo - final stint Ah Torque! ...for the sake of friends who will still be there....just a couple more weeks to go......
Anyway, whatever I still have to endure at the Zoo, my celebration mode is still quite alive. We went to see Journey to the center of the Earth in 3-D, the most expensive movie ever for me - RM17 each! - but it was worth every single sen spent. The kids just enjoyed it and next in line would be Batman....woohoo!

Some more shots, my b-day cake cutting with the kids
The MC is non other than Miss Kepohchee-ketot....

2.

Other than trying to complete the whatevereitisthatIhavetocompletebeforeIgetthehelloutofthestinkingZoo stuff, I try to remain sane by solving the cube....

....which I managed to solve in a record time of 2min 11 sec. Anybody can try beat that I guess...I am just wondering how the world record was set at 8 seconds! I did not boy myself anything to mark the 36th b-day...tho I really am screaming inside to get that legendary supremo-wide lens that I am good in handling...but that can wait...the money means a lot more to some friends & relatives than me purchasing the lens, or anything at all...let them have it first, my time will come sooner or later insyaAllah.

3.

...and I finally managed to complete the editing job for the kids sports day, concept paper for Belantara & the shots done during the discussion session...now preparing for a golf tournament shoot mid August...

I have became "selfish" in many ways - no free shots anymore, I don't offer my skills or views or knowledge freely anymore to just about anybody, I don't give input or suggestion willingly unless the audience or the person who ask for it is worthy to be given such feedback....

Simply because I feel I can just trust some of the core members the ChAPs as really worthy friends, peers...while at the same time we still push & compete against each other to produce better works than any other....envied by some perhaps. Only them ChAPs dude in this world are kool tand worthy to be trusted!
....the rest - at The Zoo especially - I cannot say much about them anymore....the damage I have suffered is too much already. Really can't wait for August to arrive.

4.

The political scenario in this country has never been so interesting....I am apolitical but I must say, I have been a victim to the ruling party since I was 10 years of age. So, basically I have no respect to any leaders who has an empty space between their ears....and that is just it! Go figure!

Anyway, the current issue actually helped me a lot to build my portfolio...some of my shots were being hmmm...well, recognized, if I may use that word, by a couple of on-line photojournalism sites....

....one of the site approached me and asked for my permission to use one of my shots....did some negotiation and we'l see how it goes from here...another step forward for me...Alhamdulillah.

36 & Rubik's cube moves 90, 180, 360 degree

Wheee!!! ayah dah manguuunn!!

Here Ayah! Amik nih!! From all of us....
(Read: We dunno what's in it but it's from us allrite!)

What is this? A cube? One big & one small?
Okay...so...like...
Like what do we do with this cube? Eeish boringnya...

Well..kids, & Mama, thanxxx soooo muuch!!!

What else can I ask for but the most beautiful and wonderful family anyboy could ever have!!!!
I called Mak and talked to her right on the actual minute she delivered me 36 years ago. Thanx Mak & Abah, for everything!

Since this is my day, I guess I am entitled for some bragging...eheheh....
See that tiny Rubik's Cube? Well, I scrambled it minutes before my birthday today and while trying to slve it I had to do an "operation" - the term me & my buddy Tai Siew Shien back in 1982 use when a cube had to be dismantled because the positioning of the colors are not correct according to the formula to solve it - this may happen when we apply pressure too much on the cube and it just broke off...well, you cannot simply put the pieces back in, it had to be in the correct position...and there's 43 QUANTILLION combinations so the best one would be to set all 6 faces corectly and scramble it again.....tough luck!

Anyway, I followed an on-line formula page - the one that came with the tiny cube is a the "mirror image" of the formula I used to apply to solve this cube....

Yeah, ALHAMDULILLAH, me being the awesome Mr Torque, with the brains and the creativotoes and all the best words you can ever imagine in this universe, I managed to solve the cube.....the first time ever since 1984! 24 years man! I am awesomenessly good!!!

No charge for awesomenessly goodness!

No charge for Awesomeness - Po

The days after my last posting (below) were just too hectic. As I wrote this, I actually wish I am lying in bed, while the rain pours heavily outside.....too fatigue yet I have to complete something by tomorrow so here I am (writing this blog instead of doing that s**t I am supposed to!)

Well anyway....the kids had their sports carnival recently, and as usual, I am the OP!
Alisya & Naufal took part in the Aikido demo...wheeheeheehee ! Seriously, don't mess around with my kids ok, you might end up in a hospital with "tangan terkehel!" They are AWESOME!

Karnival Petronas is another one that happened recently. Yeah I did some shots of my kids during the event (since I am not the OP!) but I am not going to post much of it in here...karang tak pasal2 pulak orang demo kata Petronas telan duit rakyat lagi! (For those who still think like that - WAKE UP LAA WEIH!) Ahahahah!

To cut it short, most of the weekends, we spent our time together at the condo and celebrated Naufal's 5th B'day and Aiman's 1st B'day - adik sesusu to the kids & adik to Allayarham Faris in my earlier entry....

For his birthday, Naufal was delighted to have many toy solddiers, armored-tanks, fighterplanes and all the stuff on his birthday cupcakes. Each friends get one toy...and a goodies bag - something that he kids insists to give every birthday they celebrate. Since it is their rezeki anyway, why not!

Actually it was supposed to be a birthday cake cutting but Mama tersilap mention to the Pricipal and the teachers were excited already - they always love to have Mam's cupcakes!
So, instead og baking & decorating one cake, Mama had to bake & decorate about 60 cupcakes!

...of course, the busiest person on that day was Neena lah!2.

I still need more time to be with the kids...unfortunately (but rather fortunate for my photojournalism journey) I had to do some shooting last weekend too...

One is for Belantara - Shuk & Zaid & the core fan members....really AWESOME!
.....and something is going to happen soon insyaAllah....

Another one would be the long anticipated Protes 1 Juta Rakyat...50% editing completed and in my flickr....I had the opportunity to follow & observe how a "legend" does his masterpieces - SupremoMasterSifu Jimin Lai. Really AWESOME!
Well , this shot is mine, not Jimin's!

3.
We have seen Kungfu Panda too!
Neena calls it UNGKU ANDA! Really cool movie. The kids love it sooooooo much!
...and I am allowed by them to become Po - because "Ayah gemuk...macam Ungku Anda"

Weheheheh! Don't blame me! NO CHARGE FOR AWESOMENESS!!

Bumblebee

I was up at 4am today and did some photo editing & updating this blog (title below this one). Since it is Friday, I am really looking forward to end the weekend with a happy note. I hope it will be like that by the end of today. Anyway, Naufal gave me his Bumblebee this morning - "Ni Naufal kasi Ayah", he said as I was preparing to go to the Zoo. Weerghh!! I have always wanted this toy (which was why I bought if for Naufal in the first place lah! Wahahahahah!). Alhamdulillah, I gave him a good name and it is what he is.... clear evidence in Naufal's true values - pemurah, penderma, pemberi nasihat....

I always pray that he'll be a good and humble servant of Allah and if he's going to be a leader (insyaAllah), he'll be a gazillion times better than those I have seen & smelled walking around the Zoo....Maybe one day I will tell the story here, Naufal's early days in this world. The fact is, I could not stop my tears when I merely think back about his first day in this world, so, frankly I don't know if I would be able to summon enough courage to write about it without damaging my keyboard! He's a good boy...I would never stop loving giving the best I could for Naufal & all my family members...never.

Hmm...this weekend, maybe a movie would be great.....Kung-Fu Panda is showing now.....weheheh....
There will be a meeting with their teachers this Saturday and on Monday I am going to take a day off. I just want to spend more time with my babies...



...and I must spend less time being around some filthy creatures who think they have the brain and good leadership values. I am a bit too pissed-off with the creatures in the Zoo today (well...nothing new aye?). Feel like slitting some of their throats actually...though in the end it will only make my Sigg knife dirty "tercemar" beyond use anymore...kena samak guna tanah satu lori pun tak tentu hilang bau lagi....that's how keji those people are.
A walk around the Zoo and you will realize there are just too may "bungalow lots" and "mansion" - workstations for Managers, Senior Managers & General Manager.
Mine is a shack compared to the others, I don't stand a chance to get to those positions, for years I have been denied promotion, demoted from the rating I clearly deserve...cantas sana, hasad sini, fitnah sana, dengi sini, umpat sana, keji sini, cilok my thinking & works & get rewarded & recognized for my efforts....
I just hate these people so much I wish I have the license to kill and get it done and over with, today.....
For months already, I came to work using the airgate less used by majority. I don't do breakfast. I do lunch (sometimes) when people have already spent their time - I go down late and will normally took only 20-30 minutes for a quick meal. I don't stick around and mingle with any "smart bunch" anymore. I find excuses to be alone or with my photojournalists friends from outside as often as I can....
Why? Because the damage and the character assassination done is too much and very frankly I cannot see a decent and just future for me anymore.
Even though I get things done and I do things differently and make many people look good to the top leaders year in year out, the others are just too qualified and seems to do more than me even though they actually just do much less and actually even steal other people's effort.
Now, I am asked to move out as if it is a nuisance to have me around them..and it just shows....just look at their workstations and how smart they are trying to be in their conversations!

Oh well...I am sick...with all these creatures....off to Masjid Negara.

Sari Ratu Restaurant

The kids have been enjoying quality times with Tok Mak & Tok Abah. I wish we are living much closer so that there will not be the issue of "dah lama tak balik kampung" and the kids can spend as much time as possible with them.
Anyway...we went to Sari Ratu - one of my favorite eating place - for dinner recently and I discovered something interesting - Jus Terung Belanda. I was like...Hmmm...what is ithis Terung Belanda thing nih......whonder how does it taste.....oh welll. why not just give it a try!!!

So that's what I did....unfortunately I did not remember to take a shot of the juice...BUT Mama was just too curious she had to ask the waiter how this Terung Belanda looks like!

Here it is.....

I don't know about you guys out there but I have never seen this fruit/ vegetable before in my life...I think. Well maybe I have seen something similar, a kind of fruit famous to the Cameron Highland locals which I tried when I was about 10 years of age...similar but not really the same thing.

Next time you happen go to Sari Ratu you may want to try this one...it tastes good...don't ask me what's the benefit of having it in your stomach because the only answer that would get from me is - your tummy will be happy!

Why Sari Ratu? Well simply because I like the decent choice of food they serve...and delicious too...and definitely affordable for a person who drives no luxury car and wears no designer clothes!

The first time we went to a Sari Ratu was for lunch - it was Raya and we took our maid there as a treat since she decided not to go back to Indonesia. Aliya was still inside Mama's tummy then!

Fast forward to present....now Aliya, Naufal & Alisya already know what to ask for when we go to Sari Ratu - the famous Ayam Pop and the delicious Es-Teler (pardon my spelling Indon friends!)....as for the twins...they would ask for their favorite "Teh Botol"....and Mama will definitely not miss her favorite Jus Avocado.

Teh Botol (used to be served straight from the bottle!)
& Es-Teler...

If you have never been to a Sari Ratu, you should try it soonest possible. It classify it as a humble, decent, comfortable and very clean restaurant I would bring my family anytime for a delicious meal.

....ishk..lapar la pulak dah!

Playground View

One of the best thing about living near to the office would be the relatively less travel time. The time lost on the road is less thus the pressure of getting to the office is less. I am not so sure if this is applicable to every single person but for me, it works. This means I get to spend more time with the kids. That is more important than anything else. Than everything else in fact.

Today and yesterday, I get to have breakfast with the kids and arrive at the Zoo within the same time frame I would have arrived if I am in SateVille. I even thought of going back for lunch actually!!

When the office hour ends yesterday, I packed my stuff and went straight home. I managed to bring the kids to the playground since they decided not to go for a swim in the afternoon. They had a two hour swimming in the morning and spend the whole day with their grand parents.

Hopefully things are going to be more easier and fun when we finally move in.

Aliysa.....she'd love to spend more time at "her condo"....notice the KLCC & KL Tower? I can see the condo from my workstation