When we were at the Neuro Ward, there was a Chinese man in the same room with Abah. He's a bus driver and was warded due to sudden heavy headache and a stroke, at the age of early 40. Mak & Abah became friends with the family and we were quite sad when we had to leave them behind - he was going for a more serious treatment and it would cost him about Rm60k or so - Mak hugged the wife of the bus driver and even Abah who has yet to recover, had shown on his face a glimpse of sadness and hope for the family. I would say that moment was a true definition of 1Malaysia. I wished them all the best and told them not to worry so much, because the doctors have mentioned he can recover really soon and all he need was a proper rest for at leas two weeks.
What struck me was this - even on his first hour of being warded, the bus driver has been calling all the parents of the school children to mention his situation. The wife talked to Mak and told Mak that they were worried because they could not send and fetch the school children and some of the parents were not happy about it.....some scolded them, some even hung up the phone and blamed them for not being able to do what they were supposed to do.
...this made the couple really sad and worried.
But Mak did told them, what more important is to focus on getting well soon and they would be able to do business again once the husband is back to normal. They cannot do much about the arrogant and inconsiderate parents.
What has become to our society? Why do we have such parents with no heart at all? Even if you pay somebody to do some service it does not mean they are your slaves and have to serve you every single day regardless what condition they are in. Why are they so arrogant and stupid to treat the very responsible bus driver like that? How can he drive the bus if he's suffering a stroke? They'd rather put the life of their kids at risk than taking a couple of hours off for the next couple of weeks to send and fetch their kids? Arrogant, stupid, inconsiderate, no heart at all.
Like it or not, this is our society. Now. Today.
Not unlike it was back in the 70's. Or maybe 60's and before.
I don't have the answer....do you?
...what I know is this - for the years I have been on the high floor of what used to be the tallest building in the world, I tend to set aside certain values when it comes to family matters.
Now, ever since I am out of the corporate world, I realized that what matters most is nothing but the family, relatives and the good friends that you have around you, who'd be there to support and help you in any way they can.
At the same time, I realized that there are so many things that I consciously took for granted - all those years mentioned - and now I realized that some simple things that we'd took for granted are actually what makes our life more meaningful and rich. It's too difficult for me to explain...but that's how I see it.
The shot above is of a chicken satay and "lontong" - a Javanese dish normally served during Eidulfitri in our family. Arwah Nenek (Abah's mum) used to make lontong for Eid and coupled with her own recipe of ayam kampung masak kicap....it's probably the only thing I'd devour for the duration we would be in our kampung - Kg Parit Lapis Mahang, Batu Pahat.
...but we have not been having lontong for years...ever since Nenek passed away (mentioned in this blog too). When we discovered a good tasting satay, served with ketupat and lontong very recently, we packed enough for the family to celebrate Alisya's 8th birthday....boy oh boy, were we happy to see Abah enjoying the lontong...after missing it for so many years.
As I mentioned....my priorities has changed. I would spend more time to look after my kids and my parents now. Even if it means I am not going to have as much time to do business and shoot for my personal documentary projects.
The friends and relatives that you may expect to be there to provide some help, hope and whatever, may not be the ones that would be there at all to support you, for whatever reasons they may have. No use lamenting about it. You're just wasting your time because they would not spend a time nor a dime to support you anyway....in the first place, if you think about it, you don't actually need those kind of people to be in your life, not at all, never.
Celebrate everyday like it is the final day of your life with your loved ones...and those who matters to you.
For the rest of the other people, they'd be "busy celebrating" their every days too...the big difference would be that their focus is not on "celebrating"....but on being "busy"....