Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Dear Alisya & Naufal.....

Dear Alisya & Naufal,
This year marks the seventh year, since the magical moment. How fast time flies. If I can go back to the past I would want to freeze that moment when I first held you in my arms, Alisya, Naufal. The promise I made to you is always in my mind. Watching you grow, is a blessing. Being there with you, is never enough for me...though I know one day soon I will have to back off and let you both to walk the earth on your own...but as long as you both permit, I would always want to hug you as you sleep...until my time comes. True, the years are not always filled with colorful moments but that's what it is all about. Colors add the story to your life, monochromes add the strength to your the end, you will realize, all that matters is the energy and drive to move forward and recall the colors (and monochromes) as your source of reference and fuel to continue the journey, to be where you want to be. Since your birth, I have failed - once, at least - that moment when I had no better option but to step out of that tall towers. I know how you both love the towers and how well you can recognize that oil-drop logo even when you were just barely 3 years old. I regretted to not have been able to bring you up to the higher floors that I used to work on...but please forgive me, for I have not failed due to my in-capabilities but rather due to my stupidity to put my strong believe and trust in some of my friends that you both came to call uncles & aunties at one time before the present. I have learned that at the end of the day, as humans, all that matters are their own survival...and that, you should always be aware of...friends care not about you if they are at the junction of opportunity and once they think they are beyond your league, they would not feel guilty at all to what they have done in the name of their position and power. Be aware....and never be one of them. Never ever. You are not like them, nor like their daughters and sons. No matter how high you may be able to fly, in the end, on the soils of the earth is always where you will rest. Always remember your humble beginnings...and with that always in mind, then only you shall fly. I wanted to fly high, almost made it but in the end I realized that I am going nowhere, those friends assisted the systems, focused on making many to fail. I came tumbling down to earth and for once, I never felt so humiliated yet so focus was just to pick the remnants and move on for my next effort...much to the disbelief of many, peers & enemies...but the best is yet to come, as long as we have each other, we will always make it through anything, anything at all....I apologize to both of you if I could not give a proper celebration like we used to have...but we'll do something together with our family soon, insyaAllah...for as long as I can breathe, the promise I made to both of you as I held you in my arms on that day, remains to be fulfilled.
...please know that Ayah Sayang Alisya & Naufal.

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