Friday, February 22, 2008

Full time babysitter

Time to sit down & write is really hard to find nowadays!!
...hmm how should I start....OK...the long weekend due to CNY was a well deserved break. I really had a good time - away from The Zoo and the smelly animals due to their rotten brain-cells.

I decided that I don't wanna waste my energy to even think about that place, starting the evening of CNY break....but the matter of fact is i still have to log into the blardy system and settle stuff left for me to settle. Am not gonna lament about it here lah. Buang masa. I can just say part of my job is like a "sweeper"....clear things that was not completed nicely by the excellent workers than me and if i am lucky I'd get a pat by some bosses and that's just about it. What ever will be, will be, so let it be.

Now back to the baby sitting thing...I seriously think I am at the lowest level of any attributes related to "attractiveness" other words, if I met my wife in this form I am in years ago, i'd definitely not be attractive to her!!! (Was I really attractive? Being a co-instructor of an ex-national Taekwondo coaches and avid runner & cyclist...I think was!!!). Why did I bring this matter up? Well, because the main thing that I am concern with these past few days is making things ok for the kids! I don't care if I look like a shipwreck as long as the kids are ok for the day! Believe it or not, to even complete the paragraphs above it took me 3 days! I feel guilty leaving them alone even though they are having their afternoon nap...I just hv to be with them or at least look at them every few minutes.

If it took me 3 days to complete para 1 & para 2, it took me another 7 days to start this para! Gheez...I need to find time for myself!

Last weekend, after a week of baby sitting, I decided to do something that I have always wanted to do...I went jamming! Yeah...jamming with a bunch of photographer hobbyist who also happens to play some musical instruments! It has been more or less 18 years since I last played any proper musical instrument. My favorite - drums. I can play electone organ, clarinet, alto saxaphone, tenor saxaphone, trumpet, a little bit of trombone..owh..and I actually taught myself to play harmonica when I was about 15 years old....but drums was the last musical instrument that I played in a jamming I have kinda missed it. The session went well, we enjoyed it very much and at least we managed to churn out a couple of songs quite decently! We'd be doing it again, after the election. (can't post the pix up due to server issues on the other, later lah)

On the Sunday we went to meet the neighbours of the condo - small celebration of CNY by the developer. I get to shoot lion dance and we met a couple who looked so familiar...apparently we found out that we went to the same specialist hospital and our babies were born in the same month! The dewd is into photography too so we kinda connected naturally! The will be a meeting this coming Saturday, we'll be there and see what we can offer to help the community.

On Monday, I had to say bye-bye to the kids and I will miss them for 3 days.
The forum went as expected - some blunders due to failure to pay attention to the details and preference to mingle and kissing the blardy arsses of some top leaders by the responsible people. This time I did what I have always knew I could easily do, with no "gabra" feeling what so ever...I took the mic for the first time in years and recite prayers at the beginning of the session. I can actually see some of the participants turned around and looked at me couple of times..the prayers is in 3 different languages - Malay, English & Arabic (the latter is my own doa - something that I have been doing in every prayers ever since I was 14 years old). Somebody actually approached me and said he has never heart such beautiful words in a doa and asked me the meaning of it, which I did.

Apart from that, I created a little havoc when the responsible people ran around and kinda blaming and raising the voice at me...I remained calm and unaffected. I did it intentionally, the blunder that would reflect on the responsible people.
For the past 3 sessions I have been assigned to find volunteers - the junior & senior executives from the units in this organization to become co0facilitators and prep them - a 1 to 2 hours session - for them to assist the facilitators who are MD/ CEO, SGM or at least GM level. I am not feeling syiok sendiri but i know I have done it well compared to any others who has done it before me. I did it in a structured manner, giving them the background of the fora, bigger perspective of the issue, the details that they just need to know and what is expected from them. for all of the sessions I took over, the volunteers have been very happy with the way it was done and they even asked if they can participate in the future...some even suggested their peers to volunteer and asked other bosses to nominate their subordinates to the future forums. Heck even the leaders who are the actual participants in the fora came and asked if they can send their subordinates to co-facilitate.

I must have done something good somewhere, regardless how others want to see it.

.....but in this particular session I did not manage to get the desired count of co-facilitators. So some of the facilitators are not being assisted. I selected those who I think should have no problem in facilitation - heck..these are the people who leads a company and they should have no issue handling a room filled with 20-30 people who holds junior positions than them. I can handle these bunch although I am 3-4 jooob positions BELOW them!!
It turned out some of the facilitators are having problem - not clear of their deliverables and I was pointed by the responsible people as "irresponsible" because I did not give all the facilitators an assistant each. So? I did not take it seriously because i know things will turn out fine in the end - these people are leaders so they better do it right, if they don't, they are just making a clown of themselves and that is too bad - let the participants see for themselves and let the "clown" learn that it is not a privilege but a responsibility to be where they are at., the farking bitches who are supposed to know the details and make the session perfect was like putting the blame on me, but every other members knew what I have done and what if the bigger perspective of the intent, I just don't give a ratsarse on what the biatches are saying - I don't mingle and "menggesel2" with the top leaders, trying to look in control and on top of the people who sweat and sleep less than 2 hours a day for 3 days just to make the session perfect while those bastards ignore the details and runnings of the fora and hog the credits later like what have been happening all these years, I just did my part as best as I could and "kasi ajar" those yg "kurang ajar" in ways that I could. Too bad....don't mess with leaders of the organization are not the god, though they may act like they think are!

The coming session are mine to lead...and already I have settled the prints and other matters which took the other team last minute to do - and create trouble to our support staff. Fark it..what kind of leaders who is not sensitive on their deliverables? The support staff had to come during weekends! At one pooint of time it was clear the lead was bluffing the SM of the team - I heard it & the support staff heard it. The articles were not given - heck I don't even think they actually have searched for any! - to the support staff who had to compile the whole stack...over the weekend and moss being with the family!
..and we are talking about "excellent" staff to the eyes of The Zoo here.

This is a Friday, I am taking the granted unrecorded leave so that I can be with my kids today.
Ahhhh...bestnyer...don't have to be in the office hearing people calling their remisers & contractors while I had to work and earn my pay.....I wondeer if I can get the same amount of cash monthly by just taking care of my kids....and do photography (which I have done much much lesee these few weeks)....

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